The One Where It's My Birthday And I'll Cry If I Want To But I Don't Think I Will, Thanks All The Same

Dear reader, today you find me one year older and having to remember to say 28 when people ask me my age.

You wouldn't think that being asked my age happens a lot but somehow to me, it does. Maybe it's because I don't feel 28. I certainly don't act 28 a lot of the time and (though I do say so myself) I don't particularly look 28.

You also find me ruminating on my life's work - my accomplishments and my failures. I think it's important, especially when things don't seem to be going all that well, to have a good think about all the good things you've achieved and to work out where you went wrong on the things that didn't turn out quite so well. My life at 28 is certainly a lot different to how I imagined it would be when I was 18 but that doesn't make it worse or better than what I thought it'd be. At the same time though, it's important to keep hold of dreams and aspirations and understand that over time they will change and you will fulfill some and dash others.

And so, with all that naval-gazing out the way, I'm off for a posh meal in the country with The Hairy Drummer, who has got me a surprise present. I haven't told him I tend to be disappointed with surprise presents but I'm sure it will be made of win and awesome.

The One Where July Was Actually The Worst Month Ever.

July officially sucked monkey ass. There is no sugar coating of this. It is an undeniable fact.

Not content with my house burning down and my grandad being in hospital with inoperable cancer, the very last day of July threw another round of fun and games into the mix by me being made redundant. Oh and possibly losing another job due to the idiocy of the local council believing an arts university needs a swimming pool.

Yep. July really sucked.

So what happened then? Well, as we know, I had the inconvenience of the house fire which in itself spawned a whole other world of meh. I'd had my work laptop at home and that melted and my amazing IT department took 3 weeks to send me a new one. Except they'd configured it incorrectly. So it took another week for the only IT guy who knows what he's doing to have a free slot to come and fix it.

So this also meant I was a month without proper (by proper, I mean speedy and preferably non IE) access to the internet which was, quite frankly, like having a limb lopped off. So Never Enough Shoes went on forced hiatus and I let down the Domestic Sluts by failing to contribute anything as everytime I tried, the ancient dsktop I was working from seized up and refused to exert itself any further.

Never mind, I thought, The Daughter starts school in September so I can look forward to reduced hours in the office and more time with her.

No, no. The luxury of being able to take her and pick her up is not for me. Here you go, NES, here's a letter telling you that you're pretty much redundant! Oh and by the way, your boss doesn't know yet!

Le sigh.

But, every cloud does have a silver lining and sometimes a rainbow. I've calculated that I should get a fairly decent pay off which will afford me a bit of time off which will be most needed. And it finally means that I can look at getting a proper (by which I mean something useful that I'll enjoy) job without the safety net to hold me back.

As Chandler from Friends said, soemtimes you need The Fear. I have it but I'm not scared.